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[Seer]

This is the first thread dedicated to: THE TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS EMERGENCY FAN TEAM. I made up this idea mid 2011-12, when things were getting really wild & angry on the Board.. and I saw some of the Regs were getting to be like me & wanting a little laugh & stress relief.

So... I made up a line-up and posted it.., and I included BOTH positive & negative thread posters, to make it all even & balanced. It was suppose to be a one-day laugh in a game thread, but it was such a lit with most people, that we ended up doing changes & additions, as the season went on. Since Jockdent has always been critical of Wilson, I decided to make him Coach of the team.., so if you have any requests for changes in the line-up, you have to address him with it. (I am but a mere goalie who also subs as Head Scout... LOL!)

We didn't have enough room in three lines to include all the Regs in it, but JD makes changes..and everyone is welcome to suggest other positions in the "Franchise" to be a part of, if you want to..


Why make a thread about this..?

Because sometimes the discussions take up ten pages or more in the Game threads..!! LOL!

[Seer]

****2012-13 TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS EMERGENCY FAN TEAM STARTING LINE-UP****

*NOTE: CHANGES ARE MADE REGULARLY.... *(Last Updated: January 11th 2013)*

*ALL changes, requests, complaints must be directed to RUSSELL_23, NOT Seer.., thanks! I am a goalie & head scout... I have enough pressure as it is.. LOL! Besides.. Changes are the Coach's job, not mine.. I just created this little "fantasy thread", in early 2011.

Poyetas - Maximum Taco - Trueleaffan
Maplers - 2K4RSXTypeS - G.O.A.T.
Slyro - Pawchio- Davey705
Dick7 - Racer88 - Cali_Leafs_Fan

Intransway - TheDorkKnight
XamDam - Youngbud
LeafNationCitizen - Someonestolemyname

Seer
25Alex56


Injuries: kenneth27, LeafsGuy1995 & Topher1987

Sent Down to TMEFT: calvina7x, JBOLD & PuQ

Retired From League: 17mancrush, GM Jamason

Missing In Action: Coach Jockdent; JBOLD

Extras: ( Nodoubtabouter, blake55-ml5, calvina7x... and many, many more.. are still on the TMEFT (Toronto Marlies Emerg. Fan Team) waiting to be called up..)

"BIG WIGS AT THE TOP":

GM: Beergirl

Head Coach: Russell_23

Assistant Coaches: Mapplebeck and KF_Kadri43

Trainers: Neveroddoreven & lkleung007

Official Game Star Selector:Ohyoleafsgo

Scouts: Seer (Head Scout)

Head Office: Goulet

Archives & Public Relations: naffael 1

Publicity & Entertainment: metallicarocks65

Security: Griffon1 & Oldmanleafer

Officiating Negotiators & Video Review Experts: Beergirl; Eukardios, H-B-C-Y-G, Jigson & Monkeyboy


****TMLEFT MINI BIO.****

(*As of: February 22nd 2012) *(Please remember that none of this is true.. and it is all done in fun)

In no specific order...

THE TEAM

Poyetas-

Sometimes referred to as the next Tyler Seguin, Poy is a very fast skater with huge potential. Coach JD has been impressed with his play this season and has moved Poy to 1st line, due to his amazing passes, accurate point shots on the PP.. and his natural ability to "read all the posts".. correctly. A threat to the opposition, Poyetas can be played on both the PP & PK, triple-shifted & doesn't mind making a quick trip to Tim's for the team, after each game. It is no wonder this team is in first place in the Fantaseastern Conference, as Poy already has 50 goals & 50 assists, this season... (CAP HIT : $7.5/MIL/YEAR)

Maximum Taco-

A powerful Center with a long-time high standing in TMLEFT, Taco brings an analytical mind & quick decision making to the team. Coach JD was even thinking of making Taco an Assistant Coach on the bench, because of this.., but Taco's high points, great two-way play & team motivation made it the wrong move to take him off the skates. JD still consults with him, before each game. Taco had 60 points, at mid season.... and is said to be on a slump, with these numbers...? ... Last season, Taco scored an outstanding 87 goals, with 77 assists. (CAP HIT : $10/MIL/YEAR)

Trueleaffan-

Originally starting last season as back-up goalie.., True demonstrated abilities to out-skate some of the top forwards on other teams, by grabbing the puck on a 5 on 3 against us.. and skating down to the opposing net & scoring a goal, before any forward on the other team could reach the blue-line. Coach JD immediately moved him to a Forward position. Since then, True has earned more points than any Veteran Forward on any other team, besides this one. He likes both goalies for the team, equally... and the three of them can often be seen late night together, doing interviews on "Late Night.. With David Bedderman". (CAP HIT : $8.5/MIL/YEAR)

Maplers-

Although some people only read & believe what the Media says, Map is not connected to the "Missing Muppets Abductions" in recent News... (*Kermit & Miss Piggy are missing, if you don't already know) Authorities first questioned him, when they saw the Swedish Chef outside Map's Estate sauna room, with a meat cleaver in his hand.. and small drops of frog & pig blood on his apron, with two elderly gentlemen standing on one of Map's balconies laughing hysterically. It appears that the Chef was merely carving up a large cow, frog legs & a pig for a Team Banquet. Map brings a second line scoring & assist record that can match any team's top line. In one game this season, he had four goals, four assists, two fights...and Dawn Grapes invited him to sit in on "Poach A Corner"... (CAP HIT : $7.5/MIL/YEAR)

2K4RSXTypeS -

Probably one of the favorite players of all the team members. 2K4 brings excellent face-off technique to every game & usually also brings a large bucket full of his home-made wings for the bench. When scoring is low & the team is losing, he tosses the chicken bones at opposing players, telling them things like: "Look at the size.., look down at yourself... and see the symmetry.."..., which almost always turns it into a PP for our side. As well as excellent culinary & chirping skills, 2K4 balances out the team with his "saucy" playing style... Matching Taco's numbers in points, we can really say that we have two "1st Lines"... here. (CAP HIT : $9/MIL/YEAR)

G.O.A.T.-

You don't always see him coming... You don't always hear him coming.. but, when GOAT steps onto the ice, you know you're in for some major "energy".. Although one of the oldest members of the team, GOAT still shows youthful enthusiasm, speed, energy...and a never ending spirit to win. This is why he has recently moved up to 3rd line., during ValJames' recent injury. He scored all 8 goals, in a 8-0 victory last week.. and with his modest demeanor said: "Yeah.. It was nice.., but I missed three in the second."
(CAP HIT : $9/MIL/YEAR)

17Mancrush- (*RETIRED)

Crush is a Western boy, with an Eastern heart. With 50 assists in his last 30 games, Pawchio feels like a first line center, with a handmaid beside him.. Crush can set up anyone, from anywhere on the ice, it seems.. He has also scored from behind the net seven times this season, causing officials to check his uniform thoroughly every game, looking for rearview mirrors... Crush has had no penalties so far this season, but he was arrested in October for putting a live donkey in Ben Fealey's car, ...filming it, loading it into You-Tube.. and labeling it: "A Jackass In His Car". While Mr. Fealey returned to the car and saw the mess left by the donkey, two passers by yelled out: "You're full of it anyway, Fealey.." Crush was then given the ultimate fan award that same night, placed on first line for the game & taken out for dinner by JD, after. (CAP HIT : $7/MIL/YEAR)

Pawchio-

Pawch is another center who can easily play on the 1st line, when called upon. He skates circles around the opposition, as well as standing up for his fellow team-mates when needed. His slap shot is feared by most in the FNHL, as he drove a shot to the net in January that went through the glass, through the brick wall... and ended up in a small ravine across from the arena.. When asked who taught him such a skill, he said: "My Paw"... His name is delineated, by his Indian-Mexican heritage.. and two of his most famous fans that show up for every game.. Peech & Pong.. (CAP HIT : $7.5/MIL/YEAR)

Davey705-

The most consistent player, ...in terms of games played. As well as being in every regular season game, Davey also played every pre-season game, this season... A point-a-game wingman, Davey was nominated Assistant Captain, in October... He is a big help with team morale and never fails to motivate other team members in every game. Davey and Crush understand & read each other so well at times, that Pawch says he thinks they are twins. Out-thinking, out passing & out witting the opposition, Davey is a valued member of this team. (CAP HIT : $7/MIL/YEAR)

LeafsGuy1995- (*M.I.A.)

A very deceptive player... '95 pretends he wants the opposing team to win, gives them all compliments, wins their trust... and then imitates opposing player;s voices & gets passes to cause turnarounds.. and win us many games. His nickname is "The Fox", because he likes to lure his opponents into a false sense of trust & then go in for the kill. A great go-to guy, when the game is close. (CAP HIT : $6/MIL/YEAR)

Racer88-

Another very fast & terrifying player, to any & every opposing team. Racer has managed to knock out ten players this season, but only has four penalty minutes. He has a large fan following.. and many beautiful ladies flow to arenas all over North America to watch him play. Utilizing this, Racer often positions different girls at certain points along the glass (with pre-paid tickets he buys, selling leftover wings from 2K4).. and then he gives them instructions. During face-offs, he will point at the glass & yell something about the opposition doing something wrong to the Refs, wait for them to turn their heads & look at the ladies, then.. lands 4-5 lightning-fast rabbit punches on the opposition. By the time the officials turn their heads back around, the player is out cold on the ice, with Racer scratching his head and saying: "It was Dawn Grapes, not me"...
(CAP HIT : $6/MIL/YEAR)

Cali_Leafs_Fan-

One of the Vets on this team, Cali brings a sense of balance to this sometimes overly confident team. He was nominated as player of the game twelve times this season, just with his ability to calm the team members down in the 3rd period.., keep the momentum going... and score the winning goal. Coaches on other teams wonder why Coach JD uses this guy on 4th line duties right now, but JD just laughs & tells them that we basically have four f#1 lines.. and it really doesn't matter who plays where. (CAP HIT : $7/MIL/YEAR)

Someonestolemyname-

A rookie with high expectations form the sports panel discussions, Someone is.... "someone to be reckoned with"... He led the junior team in goals for a D-man last season.. and has graduated to the big team, with little problem. The only problem that the coach is concerned about, is that he can't seem to remember his name & often misses the call to change, when he is yelled at..., so he often plays double shifts, thinking his name is Somecrosby... (CAP HIT : $5/MIL/YEAR)

Zizzzy-

First started in January as a 3rd line D-man, Ziz has progressed far beyond expectations.. With 15 goals, in his last 18 point shots, Coach JD has slotted him into the first pairing. Ziz's background is kind of unknown... Some FNHL critics think that because of his appearance & abnormal skating speed & shot (115 MPH) here, that he might be.. "an alien"..? Ziz denies this.. and says that his small stature, grey skin, hairless body & unusually large eyes are just do to the work his father did, in "astro-radiology". (CAP HIT : $5.5/MIL/YEAR)

LeafNationCitizen -

Another of our staff who just got promoted from Scouting into the line-up. JD is unaware yet, but LNC was the highest scorer on our arch rival, just two seasons ago.. (thus, the Ottawa Citizen reference, with his name). LNC told Ottawa to shove it & told them that he would "I would rather be a Scout for TMLEFL, than be a little booing pout, for Ottawa"... He also likes trout, enjoys to shout... and never has a doubt.
(CAP HIT : $6/MIL/YEAR)

Youngbud-

If you want to scare an opposing team from coming anywhere near your goalie, you would pay huge sums of money to have "The Rock 'em Sock 'em D-line"... on your team. "The Bud" is one half of this dynamic combo. You never know what to expect with this player. He could be nice & quiet one moment.. setting up plays for the forwards.. and at other times... he will fight two opposing players at the same time..and still make it back to the bench after, for wings.

"The Bud" has been benched by Coach JD three times this season for hitting the wrong players, but no one can argue his enthusiasm to win... He still has managed 20 goals & 20 assists this season, with 213 penalty minutes..., four game misconducts.. and many threatening letters from the opposing fan-bases. (CAP HIT : $7/MIL/YEAR)

XamDam- (*M.I.A.)

The newest of our D-line... and also the unluckiest. Plagued by a series of mysterious non-game accidents ( Crazy glued privates to a toilet seat / Tongue frozen to a steel fence outside a Women's College/ Burned derriere from an outdoor BBQ, when he tried to get frisky with the Ice Girls).

Xam.. has missed most of the season, up until now. In his first game back, he mistakenly went to the wrong bench at game start & took off on a shift & ran over Seer... Coach JD was just about to ask Jamason to trade him, or he was just going to put him on waivers & get picked up. Luckily (for Xam & the team) his mysterious ways seem to be coming to an end.. and in his last two games, he was responsible for 147 blocked shots.. Coach JD then re-evaluated his contribution to the team. (CAP HIT : $5/MIL/YEAR)

Seer-

The Old Pom-Pom in the crease... Even as far as the top row of the Arena, you can usually hear Seer yelling words of encouragement to the whole team. In his first ten starts this season, he recorded five shut-outs, three games with one goal against... and two were 8-2 losses..

When asked what happened during those two terrible games, Seer said: "I can't concentrate sometimes, when Racer brings all those ladies to games.. In these two games, we were playing Los Angeles & New York. The ladies that came to those games were dressed in thongs & bikini tops.. I guess I lost concentration.., even more so in the 2nd game, after Xam ran over me by mistake"...

Seer is often seen looking up to the sky & praying, but there are those that expect he might be cueing videos for the big screen, with a hidden remote. He jointly & happily equally shares starting goalie position, with 25Alex25. (CAP HIT : $9/MIL/YEAR)

25Alex25 -

If ever there was team in the FNHL that is said to have two starting goalies, this would be the perfect example. Also an older Vet like Seer is, Alex has mentored several goalies throughout the team's seasons.. and runs a goalie training camp in the summers, for underprivileged chimpanzees. He says that they are actually easier to train, than humans, because they don't complain as much. Alex is often referred to as "The Mesmerizer", as he can mesmerize opposing players with his eyes (due to 25-25 vision, most likely).

When Seer was hit & out for awhile..., Alex took the reigns and gave the team 18 out of 20 possible wins... Both goalies have mutual respect for each other.. and are often seen arguing for the other to the coach, as to who should start. They have both played an even amount of games this season.. and Coach JD doesn't see changing what isn't broken. "Having two strong goalies to take us into playoffs, is something that every Coach dreams about". (CAP HIT : $10/MIL/YEAR)

Intransway -

Much like our goalie 25Alex25..., Intransway has the uncanny ability to almost hypnotize the opposing players.. and put them "in a trance"....

Having just recently moved up from the farm team, Intrans hopes to show his years of experience on the D-line, as a player who has both skill... and... toughness. His patience & quietness on the bench is something Coach JD has been impressed with.. (probably due to his years of touring in Rock bands in loud environments...and the afternoon teas with Tephen Styler, ...where he was unable to get a word in)....but this is in radical opposition to the loudness he brings to the ice surface..

Although he is also a talented singer & sax player, Intransway is not usually one to "toot his own horn".... He would rather surprise the opposition in the corners with a loud rendition of Thunderstruck, when they least expect it... Female fans outside the FACC say that he is "A real saxy guy"... The thing is, they are all from senior citizen housing... (CAP HIT : $7/MIL/YEAR)

Tuckerintensity1 -

Tuck brings a Veteran presence to the line-up, ...although he has recently been playing in the Minors at $1 million/ season... His intensity is also seen in many other areas of his life, as he drives a hopped-up LOTUS Esprit, has a $20 million dollar estate... and is often seen around town with either Polly Darton or Samela Pue Anderson by his side.

Tucker is even more intense on the ice... In three games, while defending our D-line during 5 on 3, Tuck scored a- goal-a-minute.., then immediately after each goal.. went back to the bench, ...draped an extra large towel over himself, with his hands & arms pointing upwards, underneath.. When asked what he was doing by the Press at these times, after each game.... Tucker said" "Oh.. I just like to be "in tents"...".
(CAP HIT : $6/MIL/YEAR)

Nodoubtabouter -

No worries.., no pain..., no looking back to the past.... and "no doubt about anything", is how most describe "The Nod"... A D-man who has worked with Tuck for many years, Nod brings the same commitment & endurance as his line-mate. Last season..., Nod had a plus/minus of +69.... There were no goals scored against the team, when Nod was on the ice...

His love of garlic, beer, beans and pickled eggs (before each & every game) usually has the oppositions' players staying clear of him. Some have even had to be carried out on stretchers, after they checked Nod into the boards, only to have mass clouds of gas knock them out. Coach JD has also allowed Nod to have his own dressing room, because of these same reasons.
(CAP HIT : $5.5/MIL/YEAR..and sixty nine cents)

Slyro -

"Sly"... as he is known to the team, was on the team last season, but had to take a leave of absence for awhile, due to problems with "The Family Stoned"... Slyro brings a West Coast flair, motivation (legal & non-legal) to the team, as well as an uncanny ability to pump up the team mebers in the dressing room.

When asked to say a "few" words about his return, this is what Sly had to say:

"I think the main focus of this team needs to be on never giving up any game, as long as there is still a possibility to move forward. We need a full sixty minutes or more, from every member on the bench. The Coach needs to hybrid his own game style with each and every individual of the team and make sure that each member of the team understands that he wants to have a hybrid meeting of the minds, as well as learn from each other, no matter whatever time it takes to accomplish this.. and.. we should all understand that the rudimentary physics of aligning ourselves with the vast star system of the universe should be aligned with the same way that we line up the edge of every paper we use to motivate our team after each game. I think there is much more to be said about this subject and that we should continue to talk openly amongst ourselves in the dressing room, as well as talk openly with each other on the bench throughout each game, to achieve this possibility of a conglomeration of minds that will only result in more wins for this team and......"....

..(and then the reporters were gone.. (and then Sly stopped talking.. and found himself alone.. realizing that the game had been over for ten hours..). (CAP HIT : $3/MIL/YEAR... *Plus two truck-loads of combustable perks)


TheDorkKnight -

Dk is not a "dork", by any stretch of the imagination... His keen hockey sense... His extraordinary attention to details of every game... and his ability to know what Coach JD is going to say (before he even says it) is something that only adds to his aggressive & immaculate control of the puck, ..in each & every game. DK is also returning to the line-up after a stint in Europe... (*see the later post in this thread). When asked to say a few ords about his return, DK said: "I really don't know what to say...., because Slyro has just said so much that I kinda forget what year it is, never mind what position I am going to play tonight..?!"
(CAP HIT : $5.5/MIL/YEAR)

Sluggo - (*NOT RESIGNED - TRADED)

Sluggo... or... "The Slug Man" (as the team refers to him as).. didn't get his name by chance.. Sluggo has put more players on IR, than the accidents on the AUTOBAHN HIGHWAY has, in the last 50 years.. ! The amazing thing about this, is that Slug does this with "clean checks".. There have been many games, when Sluggo was the only team member left on the ice in an upright position, but this was probably due to the fact that the game was over for two hours.. and although seventeen cases of "team water" had been consumed, that Sluggo has no problems with handling copious amounts of liquid & still "skating a straight line". When asked if he would like to say a few words to the Press,... Sluggo replied:

.."Hell No!! Slyro has said enough for the next three seasons already... and all I want to do.., is get out there, win every game... and see how much liquid I can contribute to the local blood bank, from my opponents.. Besides.. You press people are wussies..! Get out of our dressing room!!" (with that being said, ... there was mass rush to the exits from the whole Press committee..).

(CAP HIT : $4/MIL/YEAR)


"THE BIG WIGS AT THE TOP":

Coach:

Russel_23 -

Russell is a rough and tough tumble bear who thinks everything that happens at the acc and with the leafs revolves around him... He was a past rookie of the year (1977), most sought after ufa (1987), ...is going into the FNHL hall of fame and is having his jersey retired... (but, custodians at the HOF say that it needs to be washed several times first, because it smells a little "gamey"..)

Russ thinks that FNHL officials need to be slapped if they do not drop the puck... and he can pound on anyone he wants.... He has a theme song to the winnie the pooh jingle.... if ya want the words let me know... LOL! Russell even has a silver and blue leafs wig...., but the team has asked him not to wear it during games against the Lightning, because it looks like he is on the wrong bench..

As well as being Coach, Russell also offers some of his personal time to supporting worthwhile causes around the city... Just last week he was spotted at Jarvis & Wellesley, helping some wayward young lady with her fishnet stockings.. and offering her money to wear blue & white ones, instead of the usual bl;ack.. (at least, that's what we think the money was being offered for..?)

The team is a but shocked at the recent changes to Management, but they hope that Russell's connection to Yogi Bear p[roves to be a wise move in Beergirl's selection of a new coach... She said in a video interview yesterday.., that her only concern would be if one of the TMEFT (Toronto Marlies Emergecy Fan Team) players came up ... and Russell tried to be "smarter than the average Ranger"...

The team welcomes our new Coach... and wants to know when we will all be invited to dinner, at his new luxury, four-story condo on the Lake.. (actually "on the lake"..., not just near it)..., that Beergirl so generously offered to him...

Jockdent - (*EX-COACH)

A strange combination... Probably rated by many as the most hated Coach in the whole League, but also the coach every hockey player will work his butt off for (although, some are not sure if they do this out of respect, or fear). JD has taken four different teams to the Cup Finals in his career.. and would have had a fifth ring, if he hadn't of told Barry Wettman that he was "a little girly man".. and poured some of 2K4's sauce on his head. Bettman insulted back... JD pants'd him... Wettman told him he would make sure he was "fired for life"... JD pulled the team out of the finals... and they lost, due to forfeit.

The following season, when Wettman tried to have JD fired (which he did, temporarily) Toronto offered a huge amount of money to get him. Later that same season, Bettman was convicted of indecent exposure, when he was found in a disco with a see-through bra, matching panties & corset. His attempts to ruin JD were than dismissed.. and JD still has great blackmail pics on his cell-phone, for any future dealings with "Wetboy".. (He has also been known to karate players who don't follow orders, so there is rarely any arguments in the dressing room.) ($7/MIL/YEAR)

Assistant Coaches:

Mapplebeck-

Some players love him.. Others hate him... But no one can argue with his success rate. Mapple.. is a tough, nose to the grindstone Assistant, who is sometimes a major factor in motivating the team during games.. His hockey knowledge and experience have helped this team to rise to where it is.. and Coach JD says, "Mapple always smells nice, too..." He can't say the same thing about the locker room. ($5/MIL/YEAR)

Fabersteve - (*M.I.A.)

The team's "Special Teams Specialist"... "Faber has a mind ...as sharp as a saber"..., most often say. He can look at an opposing team for five minutes, access their strengths & weaknesses, make a perfect PP and/or PK plan... and still have time to go the concession for a dog before the next play starts. Players on the team say that they are never quite certain of how Faber's plans will work, but that they also.... never fail to be right. One of the newer coaches on the team, Faber is showing to be a long time member of the club. ($5/MIL/YEAR)

GM:

Beergirl -

Beergirl has been around the League since the creation of the FNHL & the TMLEFT... She knows all the angles of the business.., but has sometimes been known to often just walk into the team dressing-room & "squeeze a brownie or two"... In fact, she always seems to have a box of Brownies o her desk.. and even has photos of them on her wall..

Also referred to as BG.., Beergirl has more "power & enforcement of rules" than most other GM's in the League.. She can literally stop all actions, with a small movement of her finger..., making many people believe that she has magical powers... This frightens the opposition GM's into doing deals at her own choosing & prices, which is only a good thing for the team..

*Note: The author has kept this particular Bio. simple & clean, as to not agitate the "girl with the beer"...

Jamason- (*EX-GM / RETIRED)

Recently inserted into this role, as Beergirl left the organization and went to Washington for a huge salary hike, Jam is still one of the background keys to the team's long term success.. His sense of humor and wit make him a joy at the trade table... He often brings along a bottle of smooth, aged whiskey, to soften the deal & close. Many times in the last few months, Jam has been seen walking out of the trade talks, while all the other GM's are not seen on their feet until the following day... We expect he will be "pouring offers" this week sometime.. Jam also has an extensive Blues collection, ...for those bad seasons.. ($9/MIL/YEAR)

Trainers:

Neveroddoreven - (*M.I.A.)

The most demanded trainer in the FNHL... No explanation really needed, but... Nev was offered contracts to work for 30 out of 30 FNHL teams, but only Toronto offered a salary plus many bonuses. Known around the League by many players, Nev has hands that can take every pain away.. and a face that will make you forget why you were injured in the first place.

A Master of the anatomy, Nev can pinpoint any injury within five minutes.. and have a remedy for it another ten. She doesn't use any pharmaceutical drugs in her rehabilitation techniques, but many have come out of her therapy sessions with silly, drug-like, puppy dog smiles on their faces. ($5/MIL. & 69 cents/YEAR + Perks + Car allowance/chauffeur + over-time + luxury condo. + stocks)

lkleung007 - ($2/MIL/YEAR) * M.I.A.

Although a trainer right now, "007" recently put on skates during a practice and floored Coach JD with some fancy-dancy skating & shooting... "He seems to have covert manuevers, not unlike a secret agent", said JD. It looks like he just might get that 2nd shot at the big league, after all.. 007... usually assists Nev.. and he is happy to be at her beck & call... The only thing he seems to demand all the time, is a martini.. "shaken, not stirred.."..

Scouts:

Seer - (Head Scout) (*Refused extra salary for this position... Giving it away to homeless boyscouts )

Sees all... knows all... about prospects, (but is still learning about hockey players). Also, being one of the team's goalies, he can talk up a good storm with any possible prospect considerations (actually.. we have to be honest here... he can just keep talking forever about everything..., which is why his office is on the roof).

Head Office:

Goulet -

(No one is really knows how much Goulet gets/takes home..? We think around $4/mil under/over?)

We're not exactly sure of everything that Goulet does in the office. All we know, is that after gate receipts have been counted, there is often a three minute power outage... and Goulet is then later usually seen dancing in a local bar with large amounts of cash falling out of his pockets.. When asked about this, he said that he charges double admission prices on game day, then take the rest of the money to a local "ladies of the evening shelter".. (Estimate: $20 million/season..?)

Archives & Public Relations:

naffael 1 - ($1/MIL/YEAR)

If it happened..., is happening.. , or is about to happen, ...Naf knows all about it... And if he doesn't... It's just probably made up gossip from someone, like: Karen Kegger, Dhick Dillberry, or Bevin Wimpson.

Publicity & Entertainment:

metallicarocks65 - ($1/MIL/YEAR + free premium concert tickets to all shows)

Strangely..., our entertainment parties, game intermissions & gatherings have become very heavy...almost Metal-like", since this guy has joined the team.

Security:

Griffon1 - ($2/MIL/YEAR)

Grif is a solid, world-wide known security officer, who has also been trained in the Forces, covert espionage missions and has also spent time as a day-care assistant. All factors come into play, guarding a team like this.
Grif uses a scarf over his lower face, to mask the words he really wants to say at times... and also prefers to use this over handcuffs, ..for those problem situations.

Oldmanleafer - ($1.7/MIL/YEAR)

OML has been employed as a bouncer, hit-man, boxer, extreme fighter... and preaches on Sunday mornings at an all girl bible college...

And we have many more team members, rookies, prospects, other positions, players on IR, etc.. Contact Coach JD for a position or about any changes...

[fabersteve]

ok one of the coaches are here now , we can get down to business and put some pucks in their net.

[Seer]

********* TMLEFT FAVOURITE BAND CHOICES (1960-2000)*********

( *EDIT: Cut off date has passed... February 27th)

[XamDam]

I am 99% now woooo this going to be a good game.

[Seer]

I think this where the problem started for me..., Coach.

[fabersteve]

get back to work enough laying around

[trueleaffan]

Unable to delete

[Seer]

I am 99% now woooo this going to be a good game.

JD has you in the Press Box, Xam... He hasn't gotten confirmation from the doctors, yet..

Sigh..

Head trauma is such a sad thing... LOL!

[Seer]

get back to work enough laying around

What a slave driver..!

[XamDam]

JD has you in the Press Box, Xam... He hasn't gotten confirmation from the doctors, yet..

Sigh..

Head trauma is such a sad thing... LOL!

Ok you told them two lies now and now the truth is out, i was hit in the head by a penguin fan ( my son ) and have only recovered 99% now.

So lets get the show on the road before he hits me again.

JD get the doctor to waive me on to the ice tonight and get me more helium for a quacker night.

[Seer]

NOTE: I forgot to post a Press Statement, from today's line-up changes...

TML Emergency Fan Board Of Directors:

TML Emergency Fan Team wishes Beergirl good luck with her new position as GM for Washington.

"It was a tough decision for us to her let her go (says: President Wanna Cupnow), but we felt that all the members of the team (players/coaches/etc.) should be from the public fan base... withour extra "moderation" from the higher class.."

Coach Jockdent will remember his younger years with Beergirl in College, fondly... and also wishes her well...

[Seer]

Ok you told them two lies now and now the truth is out, i was hit in the head by a penguin fan ( my son ) and have only recovered 99% now.

So lets get the show on the road before he hits me again.

JD get the doctor to waive me on to the ice tonight and get me more helium for a quacker night.

Team enforcers are on it, Xam... PAYBACK!

[racer888]

Ok I am a 4th line centre. I know my job, very 1st shift I am going down the ice and bodyslam the goalie to see if I can get him off his game. I will take the 2 minutes for the team. Coach make sure you have the PK'ers ready

[XamDam]

Team enforcers are on it, Xam... PAYBACK!

Good make sure to sneak up on him as he likes to slip away like a real penguin.


Hit him twice for me enforcers.

I like that pic Seer

[Seer]

Jockdent is putting me in tonight, so everybody protect my crease, okay..?

[Seer]

The one really good thing about this team...?

We get our own cheerleaders, ice-girls (stick-boys for the ladies)...

[Seer]

And although the above is permitted, we don't want our players on this fan team moonlighting, like Bozie here... LOL!

Tyler Bozak (Toronto Maple Leafs), Mike Smith (Phoenix Coyotes), Ryan Hopkins (Edmonton Oilers), Semyon Varlamov (Colorado Avalanche), Mark Visentin (Phoenix Coyotes).

[MaximumTaco]

Yeah! Totally changed my title to reflect my new line up position!

[Seer]

Yeah! Totally changed my title to reflect my new line up position!

Huh?